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05 July 2010 @ 03:01 pm
"Tell Me" (Chloe/Chlex one-shot- Angst- PG): Entry for NS Fanfic Challenge #10- Secrets  
TITLE: Tell Me...

CHALLENGE: Entry for Naughty-Seduction Fanfic Challenge #10 May 2010- “Secrets”

AUTHOR: Lexie aka
[info]lillianschild 

RATING: PG-13

SUMMARY: “There are secrets in my heart, tears in my eyes and a person on my mind.”

A/N: This fic is set around the time prior to Season 4’s finale.



TELL ME…

“There are secrets in my heart, tears in my eyes and a person on my mind.” Sato Haruo


Dark and mysterious are his eyes. They’re blue-grey like the sea when it’s choppy and the skies when overcast, the silent and yet ominous announcement of a raging storm on the horizon. They can get as dark as the night from which he wishes he could escape, the pitch black which is synonymous with a Luthor. She has seen his pupils darken with barely restrained power in the aftermath of a father-and-son confrontation and blacken with that all-consuming passion which she has experienced first-hand- a secret she’s been zealously hiding from the world.

He’s always been a riddle and she’s always been one for seeking the truth and unearthing the deepest darkest secrets. And she’s aware that those intense eyes of his hold a hundred untold secrets in their hidden depths. She’s been able to discover several of them with her relentless investigative and computer skills- he’s good at burying what might taint the image he’s been striving to create in his eagerness to be accepted and loved, but she’s never taken any prisoners when uncovering the truth can make the world she lives in a better one. And there are too many people like the Luthors not to feel the need to make a difference. She got burnt bad last summer when she dared play with the Devil incarnate and almost died and had her own father killed in the process. She wants to believe she’s learnt her lesson and yet there are times when she wonders if she isn’t going too far; looking for and finding secrets she isn’t sure she’s entitled to.

There are a hundred untold secrets in his eyes and she’s been the keeper of one of his most closely guarded secrets for almost a year now. She wishes she could give this one secret back because it was coerced out of him and because it’s too personal; it makes him too human and she can’t afford that. She can’t afford to see him that way if she wants to shelter her heart and protect the key to the mystery which has been hanging like a sword of Damocles over his friendship with Clark. Lately, when they chance to cross their paths at The Talon and she raises her eyes from her laptop to find him sitting in a corner with his latte and the financial section of The Daily Planet, she wonders if he hasn’t already discovered the truth. And today, when their gazes lock for a fraction of a second across the crowded room of the coffee shop, she can feel his all-seeing eyes boring deep into her, searching for her little secrets, Luthors don’t beg, but she knows him well enough to understand he’s silently asking her to trust him with them; and there’s a fleeting moment when she remembers a summer morning and feels tempted to give in.

She feels herself drown in those eyes she’s seen at very close range, so close she could count the greenish and golden freckles in them. Tell me you love me. Tell me you need me. Tell me your secrets. Tell me what I want to hear. Tell me that you really care, said those eyes she’s been doing her best to dodge ever since she came back from her self-imposed exile. She remembers the desperation and the vulnerability reflected in them as his lithe body hovered over hers and she welcomed him in hers. She had known then there was a fair chance he’d sever all ties between them when he realised what had happened in that bed once his fever broke. She was aware he’d have never willingly let another human being see the secret fears he’d been hiding since he was a kid, and that it was only thanks to the poison which was still coursing through his veins that he’d let the final mask slip.

Clark pulls back a chair and sits down across from her and she’s brought back to the present. Lex’s face, which had relaxed somehow, turns cold and impassive again when he sees her close up, but not before she notices the hurt in his stormy blue-grey eyes. Clark starts prattling on his eternal soap opera with Lana, and she feels a sudden bout of resentment and a treacherous pricking of tears behind her eyelids as she turns her attention to the farmboy and puts on her best practised Sullivan smile. This secret of Clark’s weighs a ton on her shoulders and is breaking her heart into a million pieces. She loves the boy and yet it still hurts he hasn’t trusted her enough to confide in her. It’s that betrayal which makes her feel closer to Lex and experience the anguish of being pulled in two directions. She is no longer the naïve girl she was when she entered the bargain with Lionel Luthor; she knows that Lex paddles in murky waters and that he can be as manipulative as his old dad, but that doesn’t make her choice any easier.

Clark speaks of sacrifices, of doing what’s best for his eternal flame and she can barely keep it together. She wonders what his reaction and that of the patrons at The Talon would be if she started laughing hysterically at the irony of it all. Every word feels like a fresh stab in her already bleeding heart. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Lex get up and head towards their table; suddenly Clark’s voice becomes a distant drone. She tells herself she has to put her defences up again because Lex isn’t the oblivious farmboy and he might see more than just Clark’s secret in her eyes. He can’t know, he must never know because if he ever finds out the secret she’s been harbouring in her chest since the safe house, her resolve might waver. She wishes she could be selfish and give in; she wishes she could be plain Chloe Sullivan and help save one soul now before it’s too late instead of the lives of anonymous millions as Clark’s secret keeper.

By the time he stops at their table she’s managed to control her queasiness somehow and answers his greeting with polite civility. She sips at her macchiato and steals a look at his profile as he speaks with Clark and smiles at something the boy says. Suddenly she feels the need to flee before he sees too much since she can sense her mask is starting to crack again. She grabs her bag and her laptop and, issuing a hurried goodbye, excuses herself saying she needs to type her final editorial for The Torch.

Rushing out of The Talon, she blinks away a couple of tears and fumbles with her keys to unlock her red Beetle. She has to keep it together for just a couple of days; graduation is around the corner and she’ll be able to get away. She takes refuge in the thought that the chances of her having to socialise with Lex once away from Smallville will be slimmer. Perhaps she’s just deceiving herself, considering the profession she’s chosen and who Lex is. She’s just buying some time, hoping that distance will help her forget what might have been if Alicia had never entered Clark’s life and if the farmboy had willingly trusted the two people he called his closest friends.

“Chloe?”

Her hand tightens the grip on the car key and she closes her eyes as she hears him stop just a couple of feet away. I love you. I need you. I’ll tell you my secrets. I’ll tell you what you want to hear. I really care. This she knows he’d see if she were to turn around and look him in the eye now. She’d betray Clark in a heartbeat. She’d save four people a lot of pain and heartbreak because she knows what will happen; Lex’s been getting closer to Lana and everything will end up exploding in his face. It makes her wonder why he hasn’t taken advantage of what happened at the safe house; why he’s chosen to stay away when he must know it’s her and not the boy’s eternal flame who holds the key to the mystery. Doubt gives her hope, and she turns around back in control.

“Lex?”

“We need to talk.”

Tell me your secrets.

THE END
 
 
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
 
 
 
phoenixnzphoenixnz on July 5th, 2010 06:34 pm (UTC)
Ooh, nice. You can actually see it happening that summer - the two of them drawing closer, but then pulling away because of their secrets. I love how you give a voice to Chloe's inner turmoil. Great story hon.
lillianschild: faint embracelillianschild on July 5th, 2010 08:17 pm (UTC)
Thanks, Leanne. I very rarely focus exclusively on Chloe... well... never actually. LOL. Lex rules my world so he's always the one who monopolises my thoughts and my writings, and this is even more evdent in my one-shots.
eternal_moonieeternal_moonie on July 5th, 2010 06:48 pm (UTC)
I totally love it what you have done with this story honey!
lillianschild: toastlillianschild on July 5th, 2010 08:19 pm (UTC)
Thanks for reading and reviewing it so promptly. *one of these days I'll return you the favour*

Edited at 2010-07-05 08:28 pm (UTC)
eternal_moonieeternal_moonie on July 6th, 2010 07:45 am (UTC)
awww that would be so sweet of you honey!!
karahalliwell: Sv ; Chloekarahalliwell on July 5th, 2010 07:59 pm (UTC)
This is so amazingly written. I can actually picture this happening on smallville (like it should have) ;)

Great fic, I love it<3
lillianschild: still waitinglillianschild on July 5th, 2010 08:21 pm (UTC)
In my mind it IS what actually happened. I can't believe there was no angst involved... there must have been lots of it to explain how they pulled away from each other overnight and with no explanation to boot.
karahalliwell: Clark ; flying gifkarahalliwell on July 5th, 2010 08:29 pm (UTC)
I totally agree.
purple_moon123: Chlexpurple_moon123 on July 6th, 2010 04:29 am (UTC)
Oh wow!!! Love seeing it from Chloe's p.o.v. about what happen that summer!!!
Love your writing. It's like reading poetry!!! Great job, Lexie!!!
lillianschild: believelillianschild on July 6th, 2010 04:34 am (UTC)
Thanks, Rocío. As you already know, I very rarely write from Chloe's POV so it's nice to see it turned out quite well this once.

Your words are the best compliment indeed.
Jengreenlady2 on July 6th, 2010 06:35 am (UTC)
Great story, and great insight into Chloe's view of Lex. I wish we'd gotten more understanding from her on the show. :-)))
lillianschild: still waitinglillianschild on July 6th, 2010 05:23 pm (UTC)
Yes, it's a real shame. Especially when she used to be the least judgemental of the Kent Cabal. She was most of the times ready to give Lex the benefit of the doubt when Clark jumped to blame Lex for something. She usually suspected Lionel and not Lex even after they had distanced themselves from each other in Season 4. Well, at least that was her attitude until they inexplicably made her hate Lex overnight...

I've always thought she's the one female character who could understand him.

shelianasheliana on July 8th, 2010 03:24 pm (UTC)
This is very beautifully written. I think you got Chloe down pat - she's the self-sacrificing type, the type who would resist giving into temptation if she knew it might hurt someone, and I can really see her being torn between her attraction/love for Lex and loyalty to Clark. Yet even she is not made of iron.:) Lex is difficult to resist, as we all know!:) Great story!
lillianschild: gaplillianschild on July 8th, 2010 05:19 pm (UTC)
Thanks for your nice comment. You've chosen my very latest to start with and the only fic told 100% from Chloe's POV, but well... my Lexian heart had to make our favourite billionaire the focus of the conflict.:D

I agree with you. When all it's said and done I'm not sure she`ll be able to resist him; I certainly wished she started to think about her happiness for once.

I hope you'll enjoy the rest of my work as much. My most recent pieces are mostly one-shots because that's what I can handle during the work year. I'm still writing and posting my latest multi-chaptered fic, though- Back from the Dead.